Thursday, December 11, 2008

How to Buy Murderland Part 1: H8 by Garrett Cook

1.) Tell your mom and dad that if they don't let you borrow their credit card, you know they don't love you anymore.
2.) Credit card in hand, go to www.amazon.com. Be careful not to go to www.glamazon.com.
3.) Type in Murderland Part 1: H8 under search.
4.) Click on buy.
5.) Choose the type of credit card.
6.) Enter the number.
7.) Tell your mommy and daddy they're the best mommy and daddy ever.
8.) Enjoy a nice cup of hot cocoa.
9.) When mommy and daddy are sleeping go out to the tool shed.
10.) Get daddy's chainsaw.
11.) Make them pay for what they've done to you.
12.) Use their credit card to buy copies for all your friends, and kids at school who you wish were your friends, including that girl you like. She'll think you're supercool. Particularly if you tell her you just killed your parents. She'll totally let you get to second.