Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Spam box Q and A

It seems that more of you gracious, loyal fans have sent fan mail to my spam box. Whether out of humility or sheer technical ineptitude, I still want to thank you. You guys are the diehards. You guys will be there for me when these presumptuous people who end up in my actual inbox are long gone. I realize most of these are not questions, but oh well.

Q: Indulge yourself with luxury timepiece.
A: Thanks for the advice. I'm thinking of putting up a Paypal button dedicated to a grandfather clock fund. So, if any of you wants to start things up with a small pledge, I'll take your money.

Q: Tired of being unable to perfom? Can't see images?
A: I'm afraid neither of those things apply to me. It's a good question, though as many of us authors feel we cannot perform and have trouble constructing the necessary images that make our worlds of wonder come to be. This is not a problem for me. I'm also not blind or impotent. If either of these things happens to you, you might have ocular testiculitis, a condition in which your testicles come out of your eyesockets. Seek help immediately,

Q: Hi, looking for the greatest gaming hot spots?
A: Here's somebody who really knows me. Any of my REAL friends know I am a diehard roulette enthusiast. I eat, drink and sleep roulette. Whenever I see something spinning and a man in a red vest doesn't hand me a thousand dollars in chips, I'm confused. I've been known to become violent during board games that use a spinner. Thanks for thinking of me and knowing that I'm on an eternal quest to find America's luckiest roulette wheel. Keep me posted, okay?

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